Previously on The Soul Talks, I had written a very passionate poem on Passionate Feeling trying to recreate 50 Shades of Grey feeling. It was a beautiful, full of love and emotions given on a roll. In case, you’ve missed the article here’s the link: http://thesoultalks10.com/passionate-feeling/
Today, I want to talk about Self respect and also want to clear out some myths that we think revolve around self-respect.
I take self-respect as an act of kindness, compassion and generosity, purity and divinity to your own self or to your thoughts.
Self-respect is just not a word but it’s an aura. Where does it come from? It drives its way through the generosity you have and the compassion that is filled inside you and ensures that you make a point that YOU are never down in any given situation in life.
What is happening today is we’re changing the definition of self respect and making it very customisable and in the quest of doing so, we are letting our own self down. We’re focusing more onto respect and way less onto self-respect. Respect is changing direction and its focusing more on desires and expectations. Wait I’ll explain.
If we remove self- from self-respect then what is left is ‘respect.’ Respect is what we want. Now, there is this void which is created because we’ve removed self from self-respect…this vacuum which is created will be filled only by our desires, our expectations from others and the way they will treat us- then is the time we will get respect. This is the programming which is been done in our mind. This is what is happening now.
Do not let your respect be dependent on others. Now I would like to clear three concepts which revolves around self respect in the modern-day.
Self-respect is not ego-
Ego is the feeling of supreme. It is an attitude of thinking ourselves superior to others. Ego obstructs the open mind as it gives lot of importance to self while rejecting other personalities and point of views.
It is an unhealthy attachment to self; Ego persists because we deeply attach ourselves with our ideas. This attachment leads us to resentment; we resent any thought of making our idea inferior to others.
When we are self-assured and confident against a contrasting opinion – it is self respect. In this situation we respect our own opinion while giving importance to other opinion as well. But when we have ego then we become in-secured and scared. We close ourselves in a shell thus not respecting other’s point of view. Ego leads us to argument, anger and ultimately to pain and hurt. However, self-respect leads us to stability and peace.
Self-respect is not Selfishness-
We consider selfishness under self-respect when we start thinking a hell lot only about us and then the term ‘self’ intentionally or unintentionally builds its space within the brain and then takes over self-respect. Let me clear it, if you’re a selfish guy then that doesn’t mean you have great self-respect.
It is not Self-esteem-
To esteem anything is to evaluate it positively and hold it in high regard, but evaluation gets us into trouble because while we sometimes win, we also sometimes lose. To respect something, on the other hand, is to accept it.
The person with self-respect simply likes her- or himself. This self-respect is not contingent on success because there are always failures to contend with. Neither is it a result of comparing ourselves with others because there is always someone better. These are tactics usually employed to increase self-esteem. Self-respect, however, is a given. We simply like ourselves or we don’t. With self-respect, we like ourselves because of who we are and not because of what we can or cannot do.
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